The caregiver journey often ends attending a loved one through the death vigil.  It isn't something that we do everyday and for most it is a life affirming or life altering experience.  Rarely do we wonder how the professionals that attend to deaths everyday think about the process.

I happened to read a very perceptive piece by Dr Jeremy Topin who wrote in his personal blog, www.jtopin.wordpress.com, about a particular patient.  I'll include an excerpt here but recommend reading his entire article.

Mrs. Valentine’s family waits for me in the ICU. The overnight nurse has already filled me in on the evening’s events. The family has come to a unified decision and they have called friends and loved ones from near and far. Their mom has been on the ventilator for six days and continues to get worse. Her pneumonia and kidneys are the most urgent problems, leaving her dependent on a ventilator and dialysis. But underneath the surface, her lung cancer is the real culprit. What started as a time-limited trial to see if her lung infection could get better, had now run its course. The family knows we are no longer helping her to live; we are prolonging her death. This is not what she wanted.